Katie’s Journey from Alcoholic to Moderate Drinker

A new YouTube video by Katie about The Sinclair Method:

I must say, these videos are great. She’s a real natural – she has bags of charisma – and when it comes to my own recent still very amateurish video efforts (see HERE and HERE), I could learn a lot from Katie, actually – because these are really well made.

About the video: moderation wasn’t the path that I ultimately chose. I think that the reason for that was that I felt as if I’d drank enough booze for a lifetime and I just wanted it to be over… but isn’t it amazing that The Sinclair Method gives someone the power to have that choice?

Absolutely fantastic.

Please be sure to subscribe to Katie’s channel. We need more videos like this please!

I’d actually love to see more people start up Sinclair Method-themed blogs and YouTube channels… so if you’re an aspiring writer or aspiring vlogger and thinking of starting something up (or have already set something up) please do drop me a line because I’d love to feature it on my website. It’s great to get that cross-pollination going.


***Edit: just regarding blogs, here’s something that I’ve just got to share – a blog by a TSMer friend of mine by the name of Nicky Katz (click on the image to open the site in a new tab):

I don’t think Nicky has updated it in a little while, which is a shame because it’s a really well done blog and I’d love to hear how he’s doing post-extinction. But please do check it out, because as I say this is quite a nicely done site.

In fact, I’m going to paste this into my resources section.

 

 

 

 

The “Ex-wife” and Memories of my Drunken Facebook Escapades

I know that I’ve reminisced about my previous drunken self’s embarrassing Facebook misdemeanours before, but this is something quite funny which I just shared on my Facebook timeline.

My wife, Sally Hand:

(!)

Hahahahahahaha.

Yeah, I know… that’s quite a disturbing photo.

What happened was that back when I was still drinking, about five years ago, I got bored one night and for some inexplicable reason thought that it would be amusing to set up a fake Facebook profile called ‘Sally Hand’ which I could officially list myself as being married to.

Why? Well, because I was silly like that – especially when fuelled by Carlsberg Special Brew. Hell, I still have my dorky moments even now, but back then it was like I was never happy unless I could post some daily outrage. I could be quite mean with some of the stuff that I could post, actually… I shudder at the memory of some stuff… I lost a lot of friends… but it has to be said that this is one of the funniest things which I came up with at the time.

Get this: ‘Sally the masseuse’ got more friend requests than I ever did.

But after a couple of months I’d decided that the joke had worn a bit thin and me and Sally got Facebook divorced. Why? Well, certain people who’d seen my relationship status as ‘married’ on FB hadn’t actually thought to click any further… so they assumed that I had become hitched to an actual person called ‘Sally Hand’… and how do I let down someone gently when they’re saying ‘you’ll have to introduce the wife to me’?

Oh well…

Confessions of an AA Troll: The Ballad of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda

The subject of today’s post is an inspirational, whirlwind Facebook phenomenon that goes by the name of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda.

 

…Oh boy, oh boy. Where to even start?!?

Rosenbaum-Benda is from Boynton beach, USA.

A former successful wiener hotdog salesman, Morris is a transphobic ninety six year old AA old-timer with sixty two sixty eight seventy years sobriety (his contradicting statements on the matter have become a great source of humour on his Facebook wall) and a serious fecal paraphilia.

Yes, you read that correctly.

I’m not making it up.

Rarely a day goes by without Morris harassing one of his several female followers to send him a turd photo.

The author of several deranged hashtag memes (usually on a variation of #youlldrinkagain), it has to be said that Morris displays an unusual adeptness with the use of social media and other aspects of information technology for an nonagenarian.

 

What do I think?

Haha. Frankly I think that there’s something strangely comforting in knowing that someone like Morris out there. The man takes trolling to a new, sublime level that’s pure comedy gold.

It’s good to know that he’s there to put all of us sinners in our place.

This M.C. Escher-esque schizopolis called the internet can sometimes be a lonely one to navigate for those of us in the recovery world – one with little humour and much disagreement, so it’s good to let your guard down and let yourself be entertained by the Morrises in this life.

 

Anyway, this is all I’m going to write on the miserable old bastard, lest I draw his unwanted wrath! Hahaha.

Bye for now.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

‘Rainman of Recovery’: Me and my nerdy Niacin fascination again

So since I felt on a bit of a roll I had a crack at another YouTube video (‘…and why not?’, as a late film reviewer used to famously say).

This time I decided to cannibalise an old article (see HERE) on Bill W.’s Niacin fixation and my summary of how – had Bill still been alive – he’d most likely have been very interested in The Sinclair Method.

More than anything, I just wanted to have a crack at doing another YouTube video using some subject matter that might get a bit of debate going. The video itself went surprisingly well aside from a couple of bloopers, but then again I was talking non-stop for 18 minutes – so given the fact that I’m also a chronic insomniac I did surprisingly well to keep awake (!).

Heh. After reviewing these last two videos I’ve been thinking of a new online name for myself – ‘Rainman of Recovery’.

Hahahahaha! Hey, that could work!

Okay, that’s me done for now. This whole YouTube experiment has been an interesting one with a steep learning curve, but I think I’m going to now vegetate for a couple of days.

 

Thanks for reading.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

My YouTube Video on the Subject of Trigger Immunity with The Sinclair Method

As I mentioned in a previous post (see HERE), I’d been thinking of experimenting with YouTube for some time, given that despite the fact that about a third of the world’s internet traffic goes through that site only 9% of businesses use it, I reasoned that it would be a crime not to have a go – especially since it could potentially seriously improve the stats for my site.

Hence my first attempt with the video below on the subject of my newfound immunity to triggers thanks to The Sinclair Method.

…What do I think of it?

I think it’s okaaaay-ish. Took long enough to upload. I still hate my accent and the flat, Aspie-ish cadence of my voice, but I think it’s fine for a first effort… I like the fact that it’s not scripted and I’m just keeping it real, being myself…. it’s not a fucking infomermical, in other words.

I must say, the camera on my Samsung S7 Edge phone is actually quite impressive for recording videos. It gives a really good picture.

As for follow-up videos, I’d quite like to do one on Alcoholics Anonymous and my obsessively nerdy interest in Bill W’s niacin fixation, as well as his desire to “find a methadone for alcoholism” (something which I’ve previously discussed HERE).

That and I’d like to do a series of interviews using the recorder function on Google Hangouts – the first of which will hopefully be with the British independent alcohol treatment provider, Paul Turner.

If anybody has any ideas for future videos that they’d like offer then I’m all ears. I’d love to hear from you.

Kevin Spacey & ‘The Mel Gibson defence’

‘It is deeply sad and troubling that this is how Kevin Spacey has chosen to come out’

‘Not by standing up as a point of pride — in the light of all his many awards and accomplishments, thus inspiring tens of thousands of struggling LGBTQ kids around the world — but as a calculated manipulation to deflect attention from the very serious accusation that he attempted to molest one’

‘I am sorry to hear of Anthony Rapp’s experience and subsequent suffering. And I am sorry that Kevin only saw fit to acknowledge his truth when he thought it would serve him — just as his denial served him for so many years.’

‘May Anthony Rapp’s voice be the one which is amplified here. Victims’ voices are the ones that deserve to be heard’

– Zachary Quinto

 

…..Ooooh boy.

I wasn’t going to touch this one. Why? Well, because there’s more than enough that’s already been said.

That and the fact that I like to think of myself as a fair-minded person (though I have to commend Zachary Quinto’s above classy response to Spacey’s deflection).

However something stuck in my craw. Namely this: the fact that Spacey has now ‘sought treatment’.

Yup. We all know what that means. This is far too damn predictable. This shit writes itself.

He’s already making a calculated play for ‘The Mel Gibson defence’ (see also: ‘The Michael Barrymore defence’, ‘The Stan Collymore defence’ and ‘The Chris Langham defence’) which involves him running away to a cushy 12 Step-themed resort for a number of months in order to hide from the papparazi and deal with his pesky defects of character… only coming out to share his mushy redemption story about his ‘struggle’ with his sex addiction on The Oprah Winfrey Show.

Uuuuurrgh. Honestly. This dude is digging his own grave. Not sure what can be done in terms of damage control for this guy now. Especially after being fired from Netflix.

It will be interesting to give it a few months from now to see if I’m right. I look forward to revisiting this.

 

My Noble Failure: ‘The TSM-themed Interview that Never Was’

The theme of today’s post is to do with all things techy and my chimpanzee brain’s heroic efforts to come grips with some gadget stuff over the last few days.

It just doesn’t seem to have been my week when it comes to gizmos. Honestly, it’s like everything that could go wrong has gone wrong.

First of all the monitor for my PC inexplicably buggered up on me, forcing me to use my laptop… then the brand new (and expensive) fancy-schmancy vaping mod that I recently bought decided to stop working on me for no discernable reason whatsoever yesterday morning.

The high tech vaping mod I just bought – the SMOK Procolor

What doesn’t help matters is that it’s so high tech that you have to be in fucking NASA just to follow the instruction manual.

Haruumphhh!

…Anywaaaay, thanks to knowledgeable assistance from the market seller that I bought it from I finally got to the bottom of why it wasn’t working.

Get this: the mod had a default setting in which it would lock – yes, lock – after 900 odd puffs. Stupid, I know… I mean, why?!??

Oh well… all that matters is that that setting’s been changed and it’s working now.

Nothing else could possibly go wrong on me today‘, I naively thought.

Cut to: early yesterday evening and, after having had a really enjoyable chinwag over the last couple of days with addictions expert (and fellow Your Choice, Your Recovery Facebook group member) Paul Turner, we decide to have a crack at recording a Skype interview to upload to YouTube.

A mental health nurse with 25 years experience, Paul is an independent alcohol treatment practitioner who works in the West Midlands of England. (see HERE).

In recent times he and his partner have seen great success using The Sinclair Method – something that Paul discusses in the really good YouTube video below:

…But back to the Skype interview  – and do you know what? It goes great.

Paul is a great speaker, a complete pro and a real gentleman to boot. The man is just really easy to talk to and I find what he has to say on the subject of the difficulties with nalmefene particularly interesting and enlightening (though I knew that it was much more expensive than its sister drug naltrexone – five times more expensive, in fact – I had no idea that the side effects were quite so problematic). We also share similar sentiments on how just how odd it is that despite the fact that Alcoholics Anonymous views alcohol addiction as the manifestation of a physical allergy, yet there is so much contempt in 12 Step circles for a medical approach like The Sinclair Method in favour of a religious/moralistic one.

So anyway, the interview goes great. We talk for well over 20 minutes and upon reaching a point where we both run out of steam I press stop on the Icecream screen recorder app on my laptop.

And nothing happens. I go into it and press another key and it just inexplicably starts recording my screen again.

…It takes a minute for my monkey brain to work out exactly what’s gone on here.

I have a “Ah, that’s what happened” moment of realisation followed by a slightly sick feeling when I work out that the freebie version of Icecream that I have on my computer has a default 5 minute recording ceiling… no doubt to entice people to buy the pro version… and that most of the interview that just took place didn’t actually record.

Shiiiiit.

I explain this to Paul and rather than being mad he’s a complete gentleman, offering to repeat the interview at another time. What a good egg.

Oh well. It was a failure, but at least a noble failure! Haha.

(Hey, ‘God loves a trier’ and all that)

I’m just wondering what my best option is when it comes to screen recording freeware, because I definitely want to have another go. I’d quite welcome people’s thoughts on this.


…Moving on, there’s been not much else going on the last week to report. I’ve been on another Netflix binge (catching up on episodes of Bojack Horseman) and I’ve been back into the gym as well as reconnecting with some old friends from my local open access art studio.

Regarding the prostate cancer screening that I was talking about in my last post (see HERE), I’ve got an appointment with the urology department of a local hospital for next week, so it’s just a case of ‘wait and see’. I’m just pleased that my water works issue is finally getting looked at as it’s been a source of discomfort for a while.


Okay, well that’s about that from me. Thanks for reading.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

Endorphin Vs GABA: A Taxonomy of Alcohol Addiction?

‘Antigen’ – that’s my new word for the day. Heh.

After some embarrassing problems with my water works I went to see a doctor and subsequently got some blood taken in order to screen me for prostate cancer… and my antigen score (something that’s an indicator of potential cancer) came back a bit high so further tests are needed.

I dunno. It’s Greek salad to me. I looked up antigen on the net and I found myself getting lost after the second paragraph.

Oh well. All I can do is keep my fingers crossed and place my faith in my local medical services. That and keep myself distracted,

…Talking of which: I’m currently having a Netflix binge, watching the first season of Mindhunter. What a great show!

It’s a drama all about the evolution of forensic psychology and criminal profiling in the FBI in the late 1970s and it captures the journey of two FBI special agents and their passion for their research into violent offenders really well.

Given my family’s own harrowing experience with violent crime (see HERE) there’s certain types of films and TV shows that I now just cannot tolerate anymore – anything that glamorises violent crime or portrays murderers as entertaining anti-heroes, for example – but this show is different.

It’s really well balanced because it keeps the audience’s focus on these pioneering feds (the two main characters are based upon the real life FBI legends john E. Douglas and Robert K Ressler), not the monsters they interview.

More than that, as someone fascinated in the psychology behind addiction what really resonated was the depiction of these researchers attempts to establish a taxonomy of criminal offenders.

I mention this because though I often (for the sake of simplicity) use the term ‘alcoholic’ to describe what I was prior to my exposure to The Sinclair Method, I think that it’s a bit of a misnomer because someone else’s strain of the affliction could be quite different to mine – more complex – and they may need additional counselling, whereas I managed just fine with the pill alone.

Additionally, I think that there’s as much to learn from the people for whom The Sinclair Method doesn’t work as those for whom it does. There definitely needs to be more research. Could it be – as David Sinclair posited – that these people have a mechanism of addiction that’s likely caused by the GABA system (as opposed to the endorphin system)?

I look forward to people’s thought on this because it’s an interesting question.

What’s stuck in my mind for a good few months now is something Claudia Christian said to me back when we met up in Edinburgh earlier this year. She pointed out that everything is very physical with me… that my experience of addiction was very much one of physiological craving as opposed to one of simple psychological escape.

‘More visceral’ could be the way to put it, I guess. Hmmm…

Okay, well, once again, I look forward to people’s thoughts on the taxonomy question.

Bye for now.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

The joy of blogging

It’s been a good week. The site has been getting quite a few more hits than normal (I’ve been getting quite a lot of traffic from Egypt, believe it or not – Egypt!) and I’m finding that the change of page design/menu reshuffle is really helping my readers because the new Sinclair Method resources page is getting a lot of views.

I’m also seriously considering recording a few Youtube videos using my new Logitech C920 HD Pro webcam. Just as an experiment.

Although I’ve taken part in the One Little Pill documentary and have done podcasts I’m very much more in my comfort zone as a writer (largely because I hate my accent) but the problem that I have is that every article I write seems to want to turn into a novel these days… that’s to say that I often struggle to keep the word count down to a reasonable level. Brevity is a real problem when you’ve got a lot to say on a given subject and it occurs to me that podcast/Youtube media may be easier than vast quantities of text on visitors to the site. Certainly less hard work to ingest.

Or perhaps a combination of video media media and text would work better for some articles. Who knows.

But I wouldn’t mind some advice/feedback on this in the comments section below. I’d particularly like to hear from people on what they think is the simplest to use video editing software as I would be a complete newbie when it comes to using anything like that.

Anyway…. as for what else I’ve been doing, I’ve been on a bit of a Kindle binge the last few days. splurging on Eddie Hall’s autobiography Strongman and Russell Brand’s book, Recovery: Freedom from our Addictions.

I’ve also been working on the draft of a new page for the Sinclair Method resources section of the site entitled ‘Answering the Critics: “Why haven’t I heard of The Sinclair Method before?”‘.

That’s its title in its current form, anyway.

It’s turned into a bit of a monster if I’m honest. The word count on it is currently 1,500 words and I’m only about half way through it. What I may end up doing is splitting it in half and making it a two part series of articles.

 

Other than that I don’t have much else to report. In between my blogging I’ve been back into the gym after a long absence and I’ve finally got around to watching Marvel’s The Defenders, which (after a slow start) got really good… really tying up story strands from the other Netflix Marvel shows quite well. What can I say… I’m a Marvel fan, though I did quite enjoy Suicide Squad.

Okay, that’s it for now. Thanks for reading.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

Katie’s experience with The Sinclair Method

Because I’m sure that my readers would be thankful to hear another point of view and also because (given that I’m a lazy bugger! haha) this takes the heat off me to produce new material, here’s a really interesting YouTube video by Katie in which she describes her experience with The Sinclair Method.

I can really relate to what she says about how when she was addicted so much of her mind’s available bandwidth was taken up by obsessive thoughts about alcohol. Like it crowds everything out.

I can also really relate to what she says about how (with that newly reacquired attention span space) old hobbies are revisited. In my case I got back into weightlifting and my art in a big way.

“The more you use it, the less you use it over time” is another thing that she says that really chimes with me because upon going through I recall being left with an excess of pills – so much for any misinformed scaremongering about how TSMers supposedly need to take the pill every day for life.

…Right! Without further ado I’m adding this testimonial to my Sinclair Method resources section. Many thanks to Katie for inviting me to add her excellent video (I chuckled at the few seconds of “bloopers” at the end, by the way).

I’m always looking for material like this to add to the site, so if anybody else has a YouTube testamonial or a blog they’d like me to plug for them please feel free to drop me a line.