Monthly Archives: November 2017

The Season of Stupid: My One Man War against Christmas

Heh.

I’ve been rehearsing in my head how I could write this without sounding like a complete dick and I’ve thus far not been successful.

(!)

Oh well, here goes. Deep breath. And –

– I despise Christmas.

No, I really mean it. I’m not kidding. Everybody seems like space aliens to me this time of year. It’s like looking through a weird anthropological lens watching other peoples’ behaviour. Quite uncomfortable to be around, in fact.

Why?

Because it’s like everybody’s on drugs or something and I get people doing things like trying to hug me… a forced intimacy that I don’t welcome. Especially not from the type of people who wouldn’t piss on me if I was on fire the other 364 days of the year but now suddenly wanna have bum-sex with me or something.

Hahahaha. Okay, okay, okay, so maybe that’s me exaggerating a bit…

But my reflex is to shrink into myself like a tortoise whenever someone tries to do that uninvited.

The fact is, I seem to be immune to whatever strange gas gets pumped into the atmosphere every December. I don’t get the same mushy emotions as other people and – if I’m truthful – I can’t wait for the whole ordeal to be over.

I’ve been like this for a long time. Christmas just doesn’t do anything for me. In fact, my antipathy is so bad that I make a tradition of watching slasher movies and eating pizza on my own on Christmas day.

…God I really do sound like a misanthropic asshole here, don’t I? Just hateful. I’m perhaps digging myself a hole here.

But I can’t help it.

It’s not that I begrudge other people having a good time and it’s not that I’m anti-religious (hey, to each their own), it’s just, I think, more of a cognitive dissonance issue.

That is to say that, given my atheism and my own sorta materialistic-mechanistic outlook of the world, I find that that there’s far too much saccharine for little ol’ me to handle at this time of year.

So I do my hermit thing, eat pizza, watch Zombie Flesh Eaters and cheer on Al Pacino as he tells Steven Bauer how Miami is “one big pussy waiting to be fucked” in Scarface.

And that’s my 25th of December. That’s my tradition – of sorts.


Under normal circumstances I deactivate my social media at this time of year in a desperate attempt to get away from all the tinsel and saccharine on the interwebs, but this year I need to keep active on Facebook because I’ve recently become an administrator on the Your Choice, Your Recovery forum.

It’s a great forum, by the way. For anybody who struggles with alcohol (particularly anybody struggling with it at this time of year) it’s of particular interest as it has some really good resources about The Sinclair Method and has a really good, supportive community on there.

Another one worth checking out is the Options Save Lives message board. Lots of really good people on there.


On a final note, despite my recent posts (see HERE and HERE) about falling out of love with Quora, I’ve found myself back on there writing some stuff again – hey, what can I say? She’s a demanding mistress. Hahaha.

This time I couldn’t resist answering this question:

(Click on image to open link in a new tab)

I just couldn’t help myself.

The problem? Well… I worry that my enthusiasm to get the message out there and to make a stand against the misinformation, disinformation and confusion out there about TSM has the unfortunate effect of making me sound rather “ranty”… like a nutty conspiracy theorist at times.

But the fact is, this is serious and I’ve been around long enough – living, eating and breathing The Sinclair Method for nigh on five years now – to be quite sure of my facts.

The difficulty is, given how much I owe to The Sinclair Method,  trying to keep my emotions out of my prose – which isn’t easy because I do get very emotional when I think of David Sinclair.

Though I never met the man, I cherish my memories of my e-mail correspondence with him (in which he revealed himself to be an absolute sweetheart of a man with an adorably impish sense of humour) and I can’t help but feel that it was a massive injustice that he was never awarded a Nobel for his contribution to the science of addiction.

Oh well…

Anyway, I may re-edit that response on Quora. It occurs to me that I engage in a bit too much Stanton Peele-bashing (haha! my favourite hobby these days) and perhaps could do with citing some other examples.

Okay, well I have nothing else to report for now. Thanks for reading.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

 

 

Falling out of love with Quora: Part 2

Just following on from the last post, this is something that I find that I get a good bit of on Quora:

…Questions specifically tailored as passive-aggressive insults.

(*Sigh*)

 

I get it all the time.

…I get notifications informing me that I have been asked to answer questions like “What’s it like to be a malignant narcissist” and so on and so forth – always by an anonymous questioner, naturally.

Har-de-fuckin’-har.

How imaginative.

Your comedy genius has me in awe. (Not)

Falling out of love with Quora

I’m just sitting nursing a cup of tea and pondering upon Quora this afternoon.

As many people know, I’d made it a home away from home for a while… practically living on there at one point. I really liked my fellow geeks on there and got a lot out of contributing to topics on The Sinclair Method and alcoholism. To me, Quora was always like Wikipedia but better. Or at least I thought.

And do you know what? It’s STILL a fun platform with some great contributors – I still love some of the stuff on horror movies and comic books on there and there’s still some fun to be had on there (see below for an example of a little mischievous fun that I couldn’t resist having on Quora just last night).

But it’s not the same.

 

Too many barbarians are invading the platform now and I find myself wincing at certain loaded questions that I’m anonymously baited with by certain people… certain people with very obvious rival outlooks when it comes to addiction theory. They’re just too damn obvious, in fact, and I’m frankly not going to play their game – which is sad, given that with something like 7,5000 odd hits I’m one of the most popular writers on the subject of The Sinclair Method on there.

 

Another thing that pisses me off about Quora is all of the sociopath groupies. What do I mean by that? …Well, it’s like people on there are absolutely morbidly infatuated with psychopaths, given the amount of questions and answers devoted to psychopathy.

…Clearly there’s a lot of Dexter fans on Quora, that’s all I can say.

 

As someone whose family has suffered horribly at the hands of a disgusting, perverted psychopath (see HERE) I see no glamour and no enticing mystery to such people, believe me.

 

But one of the most tiresome things? The number of twelve year olds who write to ask whether their 150 IQ score makes them special (well, they sound like twelve year olds to me… so I’m assuming they are… but they might not be).

 

I’m not making this up. People really do write things like “I have a 150 IQ. Am I special?” on Quora.

(!)

…Where to even begin! Haha!

 

So where does this leave me?

Well, I’m not going to delete my profile or leave the platform. But I do think that I’ll be exploring other areas of it in future… I’m pretty much “talked out” with The Sinclair Method on there, anyway.

These days I find myself more and more curious on other things – such as topics like nootropics and transhumanism. Oh and I still dip into the horror movie questions on occasion.

 

But, as I say, there’s too many idiots that have now invaded the addiction sections, sadly. Too many people trying to disrupt the signal to noise ratio (see HERE for an explanation of how S:N disinformation tactics work).

Sad to see, but it was bound to happen eventually. Oh well, at least I’ve still got my corner of cyberspace here on WordPress to spread sanity.

 

Over and out.

 

Peace and love,

 

GARY

Musings on Dallas Buyers Club, Autodidactism and The Information War

Well, I finally got around to watching Dallas Buyers Club on Netflix and it was really good. Matthew McConaughey and Jared Leto both turn in exceptional performances.

Sadly,  what undermines this biopic is the way that it takes some extreme liberties with historical fact in order to make it fit better into a three act play structure… for example, both the Jared Leto and Jennifer Garner characters seen in the film are invented – they’re actually based on a combination of different people rather than two real individuals. They’re composities.

Another aspect that’s completely fictional is the depiction of Ron Woodruff (as played by Matthew McConaughey) as being a raging homophobe, when he in fact had no hostility towards gay people in real life and it’s since been suggested by several people close to Woodruff that he was actually bisexual.

But if you can allow your brain to shut that information out it’s quite possible to enjoy this movie for its depiction of a group of people with HIV/AIDS coming together to form their own “buyers club” in order to (often illegally) access the best medication available in order to prolong their lives.

The best parts of the film? For me, they’re easily the scenes where Woodruff is poring over books in the library and educating himself on the best treatment options available for the virus, ultimately becoming an expert in his own condition and ultimately a civil liberties hero in his fight against the FDA in order to allow AIDS patients the right to experiment on their own bodies as they see fit.

There are in fact several parallels which I see with the scandalously unfair fight that many people with Alcohol Use Disorder in many countries have on their hands trying to access naltrexone or nalmefene using The Sinclair Method… and the undignified hoops that some patients are forced to jump through in order to get hold of a prescription.

I also relate to the scenes where the Matthew McConaughey character is ridiculed for educating himself on his own condition and the best treatment options available. I’ve had this several times over the years, with an addictions worker once cautioning me that I “think too much”.

The democratisation of science is a scary thing for some people. Autodidactism is especially threatening to some doctors, it seems.

But the question should be asked: is it really monstrous arrogance to “act as your own doctor” and take risks such as importing naltrexone illegally when you’re forced into that position because you know the default medical paradigm in your location is woefully ineffective in comparison to The Sinclair Method?

When the system has you over a barrel and your choices are severely limited, are you really the villain for saying “Fuck off. I’m not playing by your rules anymore. I’m just going to import some damn naltrexone myself”.

?

I would say not. It’s not so black and white as far as morality goes.

Anyway, I just wanted to share my thoughts on the movie. Despite the lack of historical accuracy it’s still a good watch. I got a lot of identification out of it.

Another film worth checking out for that similar theme of laypersons on an autodidactic quest to educate themselves on medicine (in order to save their little boy) is Lorenzo’s Oil (see HERE). Well worth viewing.

 

Just back onto the subject of The Dallas Buyers Club: there’s quite an interest article here about a HIV patient inspired by the initiative of the Matthew McConaughey character who has recently injected himself with an untested gene therapy:   http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-41990981

Makes for interesting reading. It wouldn’t surprise me if gene therapy was one of the next things that they’ll look at for addiction treatment. Hey, you never know.

 

Okay, well I’ve ran out of things to say. Thanks for reading.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

 

The Dangers of Playing Doctor

Following my last article, I wasn’t going to write a new post so soon… but a subject came up that I felt that I should discuss – what I perceive to be the dangers of playing doctor and also, it has to be said, my reluctance to direct people to online pharmaceutical vendors.

I find that I have to walk a fine line because whilst I do unabashedly champion The Sinclair Method as a great way to recover from Alcohol Use Disorder, I have to act responsibly and tell people to always – ALWAYS – speak to their doctor first.

It’s a matter of public record that four and a half years ago I imported my supply of naltrexone illegally (so perhaps that makes me something of a hypocrite), but the fact is if I had to do it all over again I would have obtained my supply privately from a medical doctor rather than taking the risk that I did.

Which is why I these days urge people to check out the Find a Physician page on the C3 Foundation website (see HERE). I do that and I always tell people to buy Roy Eskapa’s The Cure for Alcoholism because it covers just about every question that anyone would have to ask about TSM and it also has a section specifically devoted to prescribing guidelines for physicians.

To be clear: when I speak about The Sinclair Method I speak from the point of view of my own experience as a grateful recipient of this innovation, not as a medical professional and though I’ve educated myself on this system and I think that far more people should know about it and have access to it, I don’t know everything that there is to know.

Just thought I’d reiterate my disclaimer because though it’s good to talk about science there needs to be certain boundaries.

Born missing an instruction manual

I’ve written a great deal about my Aspie-ish proclivities as a kid before (see HERE) and it occurs to me that I always felt a sense of disconnection because, unlike other kids, it’s like I had a “readme file” missing from my software directory… a built-in instruction manual that should have come with the rest of my software but didn’t… making navigating this fleshy meatsack through the world sometimes like being thrust into the cockpit of a Boeing 747 and ordered to fly.

 

Life is still like that for me a lot of the time. I still have no idea how to mingle at parties and start up the most basic of conversations.

 

But perhaps the biggest mystery for most of my adult life was how my own mechanism of addiction worked; for the longest time I was on a quest to find just the right instruction manual to fix that glitch.

 

Of course, as far as instruction manuals go, there’s the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous… but the twelve steps were a square peg for a secular hole as far as I was concerned… I mean, the very notion of using a fucking doorknob as my Higher Power… don’t get me started! Haha!

Then there were other things that I tried like Rational Recovery… but again, no joy – I simply didn’t have the willpower to ‘shout down’ my beast.

 

Finally, I discovered a book that felt as if it was written just for me: The Cure for Alcoholism by Roy Eskapa. Within those pages I found my answers and thanks to that particular instruction manual and a supply of naltrexone I finally got well.

 

It’s good to have finally found peace. It’s good to have won my own battle.

I think that one of the most exciting things for me is seeing other people’s enthusiasm about discovering The Sinclair Method because it reminds me of my own excitement all those years ago… it’s kinda like discovering a golden ticket.

So how long before this goes mainstream?

Well, even just during the course of the near-five years that I’ve been in the orbit of TSM I can already see a big difference.

Sure, there’s a lot of frankly criminal misinformation out there about The Sinclair Method (see one ludicrous example HERE) thanks to the fact that our critics and competitors do not sleep… but neither do we.

It’s just a matter of time before TSM goes mainstream.

And with that sense of certainty I find myself getting less and less angry when I see hatchet jobs by our critics these days. Why? Well, truth be told, I pity such people for the exhausting lengths that they have to go to to smear something that is just gaining more and more real clinical evidence of its efficacy every day….

No. These days it’s a source of real amusement to me when I read the latest pathetically desperate effort by Stanton Peele (see HERE) or whoever to attack the credibility of TSM.

Hehe.

Yeah, I guess I’m finally learning to let go. It’s taken a while…  but I feel really comfortable these days.

And on that note, I shall say bye for now.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

 

Katie’s Journey from Alcoholic to Moderate Drinker

A new YouTube video by Katie about The Sinclair Method:

I must say, these videos are great. She’s a real natural – she has bags of charisma – and when it comes to my own recent still very amateurish video efforts (see HERE and HERE), I could learn a lot from Katie, actually – because these are really well made.

About the video: moderation wasn’t the path that I ultimately chose. I think that the reason for that was that I felt as if I’d drank enough booze for a lifetime and I just wanted it to be over… but isn’t it amazing that The Sinclair Method gives someone the power to have that choice?

Absolutely fantastic.

Please be sure to subscribe to Katie’s channel. We need more videos like this please!

I’d actually love to see more people start up Sinclair Method-themed blogs and YouTube channels… so if you’re an aspiring writer or aspiring vlogger and thinking of starting something up (or have already set something up) please do drop me a line because I’d love to feature it on my website. It’s great to get that cross-pollination going.


***Edit: just regarding blogs, here’s something that I’ve just got to share – a blog by a TSMer friend of mine by the name of Nicky Katz (click on the image to open the site in a new tab):

I don’t think Nicky has updated it in a little while, which is a shame because it’s a really well done blog and I’d love to hear how he’s doing post-extinction. But please do check it out, because as I say this is quite a nicely done site.

In fact, I’m going to paste this into my resources section.

 

 

 

 

The “Ex-wife” and Memories of my Drunken Facebook Escapades

I know that I’ve reminisced about my previous drunken self’s embarrassing Facebook misdemeanours before, but this is something quite funny which I just shared on my Facebook timeline.

My wife, Sally Hand:

(!)

Hahahahahahaha.

Yeah, I know… that’s quite a disturbing photo.

What happened was that back when I was still drinking, about five years ago, I got bored one night and for some inexplicable reason thought that it would be amusing to set up a fake Facebook profile called ‘Sally Hand’ which I could officially list myself as being married to.

Why? Well, because I was silly like that – especially when fuelled by Carlsberg Special Brew. Hell, I still have my dorky moments even now, but back then it was like I was never happy unless I could post some daily outrage. I could be quite mean with some of the stuff that I could post, actually… I shudder at the memory of some stuff… I lost a lot of friends… but it has to be said that this is one of the funniest things which I came up with at the time.

Get this: ‘Sally the masseuse’ got more friend requests than I ever did.

But after a couple of months I’d decided that the joke had worn a bit thin and me and Sally got Facebook divorced. Why? Well, certain people who’d seen my relationship status as ‘married’ on FB hadn’t actually thought to click any further… so they assumed that I had become hitched to an actual person called ‘Sally Hand’… and how do I let down someone gently when they’re saying ‘you’ll have to introduce the wife to me’?

Oh well…

Confessions of an AA Troll: The Ballad of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda

The subject of today’s post is an inspirational, whirlwind Facebook phenomenon that goes by the name of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda.

 

…Oh boy, oh boy. Where to even start?!?

Rosenbaum-Benda is from Boynton beach, USA.

A former successful wiener hotdog salesman, Morris is a transphobic ninety six year old AA old-timer with sixty two sixty eight seventy years sobriety (his contradicting statements on the matter have become a great source of humour on his Facebook wall) and a serious fecal paraphilia.

Yes, you read that correctly.

I’m not making it up.

Rarely a day goes by without Morris harassing one of his several female followers to send him a turd photo.

The author of several deranged hashtag memes (usually on a variation of #youlldrinkagain), it has to be said that Morris displays an unusual adeptness with the use of social media and other aspects of information technology for an nonagenarian.

 

What do I think?

Haha. Frankly I think that there’s something strangely comforting in knowing that someone like Morris out there. The man takes trolling to a new, sublime level that’s pure comedy gold.

It’s good to know that he’s there to put all of us sinners in our place.

This M.C. Escher-esque schizopolis called the internet can sometimes be a lonely one to navigate for those of us in the recovery world – one with little humour and much disagreement, so it’s good to let your guard down and let yourself be entertained by the Morrises in this life.

 

Anyway, this is all I’m going to write on the miserable old bastard, lest I draw his unwanted wrath! Hahaha.

Bye for now.

 

Peace and love,

GARY

‘Rainman of Recovery’: Me and my nerdy Niacin fascination again

So since I felt on a bit of a roll I had a crack at another YouTube video (‘…and why not?’, as a late film reviewer used to famously say).

This time I decided to cannibalise an old article (see HERE) on Bill W.’s Niacin fixation and my summary of how – had Bill still been alive – he’d most likely have been very interested in The Sinclair Method.

More than anything, I just wanted to have a crack at doing another YouTube video using some subject matter that might get a bit of debate going. The video itself went surprisingly well aside from a couple of bloopers, but then again I was talking non-stop for 18 minutes – so given the fact that I’m also a chronic insomniac I did surprisingly well to keep awake (!).

Heh. After reviewing these last two videos I’ve been thinking of a new online name for myself – ‘Rainman of Recovery’.

Hahahahaha! Hey, that could work!

Okay, that’s me done for now. This whole YouTube experiment has been an interesting one with a steep learning curve, but I think I’m going to now vegetate for a couple of days.

 

Thanks for reading.

 

Peace and love,

GARY