The troll strikes back: The revenge of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda

Well folks, after having a nap yesterday evening I awoke to THIS:

“Next time you and your pals get together after an LGBT meeting to write an article about me, try gettin your facts straight. 72 years sober today loser and I’m 96. Yous people with your darkie friends and your rainbow flags, jackasses.
You’ll never catch up to my sober time so yous mine as well Relapse tonight fairy.”

Hahahahaha.

Okay,okay, okay, so I stand corrected on a couple things. Sorry, Morris.

Oh maaan, honestly. Here’s what I have to really wonder about: the emotional well-being of Morris’s poor sponsor.

Can you imagine it?!?? Stop and think about that – and really think about it – someone’s gotta do that job; someone’s gotta help him take his inventory.

…Sweet Baby Christmas. I don’t know whether I’d drink again, but I might well end up jumping out of a fucking window if I was his sponsor.

Hehe. I’d love to hear a recording of one of their telephone calls or Google Hangouts, actually. I think it would be the comedy highlight of my year listening to what pretty much amounts to – let’s face it – the Bad Grandpa of Alcoholics Anonymous recount his sins.

Check out HERE, HERE and HERE for previous mentions on The Free Pigeon Press of the recovery demigod that is Morris Rosenbaum-Benda.

 

 

 

The Further Adventures of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda

So there I was sitting at my laptop the other day and I nearly spat out my coffee in every direction when I came across THIS in my Facebook newsfeed:

…Sweet Baby Christmas.

I mean, where to even begin starting to deconstruct what’s wrong with that status update?!?

That’s like a goddamn nuclear bomb, that is. Hahahahaha.

 

…Aaaaaw Morris.


This is like being schooled in the art and science of trolling, it really is.

The most amusing thing about it? Some of the outraged comments beneath it. That’s where the real comedy gold lies. Hahahahaha.

 

What can I say? Keep coming back. Morris – it works if you work it!

 

 

Confessions of an AA Troll: The Ballad of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda

The subject of today’s post is an inspirational, whirlwind Facebook phenomenon that goes by the name of Morris Rosenbaum-Benda.

 

…Oh boy, oh boy. Where to even start?!?

Rosenbaum-Benda is from Boynton beach, USA.

A former successful wiener hotdog salesman, Morris is a transphobic ninety six year old AA old-timer with sixty two sixty eight seventy years sobriety (his contradicting statements on the matter have become a great source of humour on his Facebook wall) and a serious fecal paraphilia.

Yes, you read that correctly.

I’m not making it up.

Rarely a day goes by without Morris harassing one of his several female followers to send him a turd photo.

The author of several deranged hashtag memes (usually on a variation of #youlldrinkagain), it has to be said that Morris displays an unusual adeptness with the use of social media and other aspects of information technology for an nonagenarian.

 

What do I think?

Haha. Frankly I think that there’s something strangely comforting in knowing that someone like Morris out there. The man takes trolling to a new, sublime level that’s pure comedy gold.

It’s good to know that he’s there to put all of us sinners in our place.

This M.C. Escher-esque schizopolis called the internet can sometimes be a lonely one to navigate for those of us in the recovery world – one with little humour and much disagreement, so it’s good to let your guard down and let yourself be entertained by the Morrises in this life.

 

Anyway, this is all I’m going to write on the miserable old bastard, lest I draw his unwanted wrath! Hahaha.

Bye for now.

 

Peace and love,

GARY